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Monday, August 20, 2018
Study Confirms: Men Will Click on Anything That Contains Boobs
Posted by Chops
A decade long study at the Ohio Institute of Common Sense has concluded that heterosexual men will click on anything that has boobs in it. The revelation has sent shock waves through the online world and damn near broke the Internet in the process.

At this point I am fairly certain that you have not internalized a single word of this article and are instead staring at that hot slice of awesome washing the car. So, for the rest of the article, I have decided to just make random nonsensical observations.

I don't like the lamp in the corner of the room. It has a stupid shape and makes me think of Twinkies.

The oven clock has been blinking for two years. I should fix it. But then again, I'm just used to it. Kind of like owning an old car minus a hubcap.

There is a white bust of Julius Caesar in my living room. Not sure why I got it. I guess it was cool at the time, but now it just creeps me out. Maybe I'll put a funny hat on it.

Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Did I mention boobs?

Sometimes I humanize inanimate objects. Like if I see a stack of plates, I take the bottom one in case it's been there for a while and is sick of holding up all the other bastards.

I have more meaningful conversations with my cats than I do with most humans.

If I were a tree, I would want to be a Scottish Pine. For no particular reason other than my landscapers just put one in and I think it looks cool.

Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Boobs. Aaaaand... scene.

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